Month: November 2014

Calm

Grey day in London today.

A smile on my lips as I think about the gorgeous days when I used to take a bus after work from my office in Irvine, California to the Laguna Beach – just to see the sunset!

I would buy my hot chocolate, walk along the beach and perch myself up on the best seat to watch the show – atleast 3 nights a week. I carried a book and my IPod with me initially – but found them distracting and not half as interesting as the live show that would open curtains, day after day without fail – with or without audience.

People would go about their lives – walking dogs, texting away on the phone, jogging/biking vigorously and I would watch.

The calm that came with being the spectator, the passenger and not the driver was unparalleled. For the few hours that I spent there each day, I did not have to make decisions or take responsibility for anything. And that got me ready for everything.

I would sit there and watch – two hours of my life go by.

Now as I run around with no stops in London, I wonder if those few hours that I took out of my life then, is what gives me the energy now.

On those days when you don’t seem to get a break from the noise around you, imagine yourself in the best seats of an open theatre, watching the best show on earth.

Blue skies, bluer water – Calm all around.

Now breathe.

A brief look back.

A busy busy day today..

Just in between work and home and everything else, I caught a whiff of that scented eraser, I used when I was in Primary school, somewhere in a hallway at home. In a second, I was reminded of my school corridors, teachers and homework.

Pleasant memories..

As I got through chores the rest of the day, I explored those memories closer. A girl I called my best friend (but never met after that), a boy who told me not to eat my sandwiches near the garden since ‘butter’ flies liked buttered sandwiches and a teacher who made me stand up all through her class hour, every day because I refused to stop talking.

Did I know then that I would be where I am today? Did I do my homework everyday and pass every exam carefully making my way to my present abode? Would I have been here, had I not done any of those? What happened to the rest of my friends who did those same things on those days? Why had their actions brought them different results?

I spent sometime on Facebook and Linked In trying to find at-least one of my classmates from that school. Saw a number of names that looked like it could be them. No luck yet.

Would finding them spoil their memories for me? Like the scent of the eraser, the memories I have of them were locked on that day and are rarely re-visited. When I catch a glimpse of something or someone somewhere, it takes me back to those days. Good or bad – I believe I want that memory held intact.

No more searches.

Long night ahead..exciting work, good music and later, much later – good sleep.

Goodnight!

Why Timbuktu? Why me?

Timbuktu is a fantasy.

In another life, I would love to live there unlisted, and un-found.

So far, days and nights, ups and downs have all been full of stories.. interesting ones, scary ones, ones I would like to remember and ones I would love to forget. Together they make me who I am, who I will be.

All of them – even the ones I would like to forget, I would love to share. Not with anyone in particular – just with the world for everyone/anyone.

No lessons, no aha moments, no ‘I told you so’ moments. Just my everyday.

Come. Be my witness.